I spent three hours of my crazy busy day at the Health Plus clinic. That annoying blurry eye thing plus painful feeling like something was lodged in my eyelid was really really bad today. My internal radar was beeping really loudly this weekend. So I borrowed money from Papaw and went to the doctor.
I seem to have a virus eating my fucking cornea, so it’s very good that I listened to my internal beeps. Doctor says I need a specialist, like right now. I ask him if he knows if I go through the low income clinic to get a referral or… and he cuts me off to tell me “No. First thing tomorrow. I’m making the appointment right now.” “But I don’t have insurance.” “Dude,” says the doctor, “it’s your eye. You like having two of them, right?”
So I have droppies for tonight and an early appointment and a small but manageable amount of fear that my eye is REALLY FUCKED. He said it was bad, that I’ve already lost vision in a tone that made me thing that vision isn’t just slacking for spring break and will be back soon but is actually gone gone.
I am as freaked out (and probably more) about an opthalmologist’s bill than I am about an eyeball virus. I am uncomfortable that there was an implication of my having less than two eyes but am comforted that the eye doctor who fit me in early will make it better. And then I am uncomfortable again that I can’t pay and that this is an expensive problem.
It is also annoying that- although I looked smokin’ hot in my fancy dress and nekked of hair legs- I had no smoldering sexy eye makeup to enhance the hotness.